How to Turn Your Dreams Into Reality

By Denise Foley for Completely You

Americans are so optimistic and rah-rah that it should come as no surprise that cheerleading was invented here.

We’re also the country of origin for The Power of Positive Thinking, the ‘50s book by minister Dr. Norman Vincent Peale; the positive psychology movement, founded by psychologist Martin Seligman; and Oprah Winfrey, an outspoken proponent of the philosophy that if you dream it, it will happen.
We tend not to tolerate pessimism. In our culture, being realistic is, well, a downer.

So it should come as no surprise that when we fantasize about what we want out of life -- a new job, a vacation in faraway places, even just to look like Sarah Jessica Parker in Manolo high heels -- we tend to forget that nothing’s perfect. In fact, say researchers at New York University, nurturing our idealized fantasies makes us forget that there could be some negatives embedded in our heart’s desires.

In other words, our pros-and-cons lists tend to be light on the cons. (You can read the full study here.)

“There’s been a lot written about the benefits of positive thinking,” says researcher Heather Kappes, who conducted the study in which she and her colleagues induced positive fantasies in a group of college student volunteers about wearing high heels, investing in the stock market and exotic vacations. But she says no one ever considers the negative aspects of such optimism.

The Negatives of Being Positive
The dark side of fantasizing is that it may take some of the steam out of action. “If you imagine everything positively and put yourself mentally where you want to be, you can trick your brain into thinking that you’re already there, so you don’t think about the work you have to put in and don’t muster up the energy to get there,” says Kappes.

You also may overlook some vital information that can help you make the right decision: That new job could have you in the office 24/7; high heels hurt and while Australian beaches are beautiful, they’re also home to the largest number of poisonous creatures in the world. Bummer.

But that doesn’t mean you should abandon fantasizing altogether.  “Daydreams give us a lot of joy and hope in life,” says Kappes. “Positive thinking can be useful when you’re talking yourself into setting a goal, such as deciding what to do in the future or to lose weight. If you didn’t think you could achieve those things, you’d have no reason to strive for anything.”

How Fantasies Can Lead to Fulfillment
Positive fantasies also keep your dreams alive until you can fulfill them. For instance, you may want to go to Fiji, but your salary will only cover a staycation. Or you’d like to work at Woods Holes Oceanographic Institute, but your only marine biology experience is with a tank full of guppies in your dorm room. A little more time at the job, a few salary hikes and a tad more education can get you within striking distance of your fantasy life.

At that point, if you’re still serious about making your dreams come true, take the blinders off, says Kappes. “If the con side of your pro-and-con list is so much shorter, it could be because you want it so much. Pause to ask yourself if there are downsides you haven’t considered.”

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Denise Foley   is Completely You’s “News You Can Use” blogger. She is a veteran health writer, the former deputy editor and editor at large of Prevention, and co-author of four books on women’s health and parenting.

Misplaced Something? Talk to Yourself to Find It!

By Denise Foley for Completely You

I’m a Baby Boomer. That means that I can pretty much remember the theme song to every ’60s TV show and have no trouble identifying photos of skate keys, wringer washers and that little thing you put in 45s to play them on your turntable that are popping up on Facebook daily. But I lose my keys at least twice a day, forget where I stashed the peanut butter, and can’t find my glasses (even when I’m wearing them on top of my head).

I need help. You probably do too. Very little is more aggravating than not being able to find something you want. Now, new research suggests there might be something that will make it a little easier: Act crazy and talk to yourself out loud.

In a recent study, researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison and the University of Pennsylvania found that people who repeated the name of the object they were trying to find located it faster than those who just searched quietly. (Read more about the study here.)

They chose to test that particular technique because “people really do sometimes talk to themselves when searching for something,” says researcher Daniel Swingley, associate professor of psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. “Is this just to help them remember what they’re doing? Or might it actually help?”

It helps. Why? Explains Swingley: “It brings more mental resources to bear, focusing them on the object they’re searching for.” In other words, when searching for my glasses, I’ll be more focused on finding my glasses if I say the word “glasses” over and over until I find them. And probably be less distracted by other things while looking for them.

For more great health and lifestyle content, visit me here at Completely You

Denise Foley   is Completely You’s “News You Can Use” blogger. She is a veteran health writer, the former deputy editor and editor at large of Prevention, and co-author of four books on women’s health and parenting.

Get Your Girls Ready for Their Close-up

New research finds that getting regular mammograms before you’re 50 just might save your life.

Remember that recommendation that women put off getting their first mammogram until age 50? Well, many experts believe it’s bad advice -- especially since a new study has found that women in their 40s with no family history of breast cancer are just as likely to get breast cancer as those with the disease on the family tree.

That means that if you wait until you’re 50 to get your first mammogram, as recommended, your breast cancer might not be caught until it’s “larger, more difficult to treat and more likely to have spread,” says researcher Stamatia V. Destounis, a radiologist at Elizabeth Wende Breast Care LLC in Rochester, N.Y., who revealed the findings of her study at the recent annual meeting of the Radiological Society of North America (RSNA).

Destounis and her colleagues looked at a decade’s worth of the mammograms of women between 40 and 49 with -- and without -- a history of breast cancer. When they compared the number of new cancers, as well as how many were invasive and had spread, they found that 63.2 percent of women with a family history had developed the disease, as well as a strikingly similar 64 percent of those who had no family history. In addition, an almost identical number in both groups had developed metastatic cancer, meaning the cancer had spread to their lymph nodes.

Cut Your Risk of Death in Half

The American Cancer Society calls for a yearly mammogram starting at age 40. In fact, a study just published in December 2011 found that having just three mammograms reduces the risk of dying from breast cancer by 49 percent. But in 2009, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force (USPSTF) -- a group of health experts that has reviewed hundreds of medical studies -- claimed that mammograms before 50 were unnecessary and got widespread press coverage, confusing women.

The USPSTF acknowledged that mammograms save lives. But their expert opinion was that the benefits didn’t outweigh the risks, which include unnecessary biopsies and treatment for non-life-threatening tumors.

Increased risk of death versus an annoying, unnecessary test? Like Destounis, you may think that the task force is “not dealing with reality.” Mammography among 40-somethings has always been spotty and by 2008 was already taking a downward swing, according to statistics gathered by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Applying these new numbers to the equation could lead to an uptick in breast cancer deaths in women who develop cancer in their 40s but don’t discover it until it is literally too late.

My advice: Don’t wait.

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Gum Disease: A New Case for Weight Loss

Gum disease can lead to a host of serious diseases. To protect yourself, brush and floss twice a day -- and take weight loss seriously.

Gum disease is much more dangerous than most people think. For one, it can lead to tooth loss, thanks to bacteria eroding the bone anchoring your teeth. But what’s even worse, that same bacteria can sneak into your bloodstream, doubling your risk of heart disease and diabetes -- and if you’re pregnant, it can even lead to a premature or low-birth-weight baby.

So it’s no wonder dentists like to drive the point home about brushing and flossing regularly at every visit. Now, they may have a new bit of advice for certain patients: weight loss.

Here’s the surprising news: A new study from Case Western Reserve School of Dental Medicine found that whittling away fat can actually help improve gum health. A group of obese people with gum disease who’d lost weight (the new-fashioned way, through gastric bypass surgery, which removed some of their abdominal fat cells) had less bleeding, lower levels of plaque and less ligament loss in the tissues supporting the teeth after gum treatment than a similar group who didn’t lose weight. They also had lower blood sugar levels, a bonus if you have or are on the road to diabetes, which boosts your risk for gum disease.

What’s the connection? One theory: It’s all about inflammation. Excessive fat cells produce inflammatory chemicals -- the same ones that contribute to bone erosion and tooth loss -- which impair your body’s ability to regulate blood sugar. They also damage gums, and then dangerous bacteria can seep into your bloodstream, where they trigger even more inflammation throughout your body.

To steer clear of the dangers of gum disease, brush your teeth twice a day and floss. And the next time you’re in the bathroom brushing your teeth, step on the scale -- if you’re well over your ideal weight, add diet and exercise to your oral care regimen.

Should dentists tell (some of) their patients to lose weight? Share your opinion below or tweet at me @Completely_You
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